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亲爱的,你是吃屎了么

Today, I woke up feeling awesome. I turned to face the sunrise in the window, and as I stretched and let out a big yawn. Only for my boyfriend to say "Baby, turn back over. Your...

2017/03/29 21:27
379
被鸽子欺负是什么样的体验

狗急了会跳墙,兔子急了能蹬鹰,这鸽子急了。。。

2017/03/28 21:26
108
一转身就会错过一打好姑娘

Today, I saw a beautiful girl on the bus. Struck up a good conversation, walked with her all the way to my office. Forgot to ask her name and number. This is the second time I'v...

2017/03/27 21:45
203
哎,我这暴脾气

Today, I attended a Buddhist prayer service for my religion and philosophy course. When the service was over, everyone stood up. Unfortunately, my legs and feet had fallen aslee...

2017/03/25 10:12
136
诗人最近都很忙,忙着去远方了

Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of...

2017/03/23 21:36
185
上帝为我遮住了眼,还特么把窗户给关上了

Today, my manager said I could go on a break when he came back from his. After 7 hours with him still missing, I started to get dizzy. I ended up passing out and hitting my head...

2017/03/22 21:40
214
得,又是糟糕的一天

是不是最近忘记了给老天续费

2017/03/21 21:44
196
神啊,救救我吧_第二篇

只有神之主宰才能拯救乃们的人生

2017/03/20 22:40
122
我想静静,别问我静静是谁

有时候真的只是想静静,可是他们一直问我静静是谁

2017/03/17 21:39
98
给新人的一些建议

1. 不要在一开始的时候就讨论性能,没有任何中间件或者缓存或者数据库可以一劳永逸的解决掉所有的性能问题,如果你怀疑采取的技术方案存在性能问题,写一个具备对比性质的demo,然后约定好场...

2017/03/17 09:06
54
神啊,救救我吧

只有神之主宰才能拯救乃们的人生

2017/03/16 21:10
54
怀疑人生的囧事合集

一定是我的生活的打开方式不对

2017/03/15 21:24
86
生活只有眼前的苟且

Today, my boss fired me for being on Facebook at work. He did it via a wall post on Facebook saying, "ur fired." Six of my friends liked this. FML 被解雇了,今天在上班的时候上F...

2017/03/13 21:46
45
人傻自有天来收_2

Today, I tasted a perfectly salted, crispy, and dead carpenter ant hidden in my bag of pistachios. FML 有什么比开心果更脆更好吃的?死在开心果里面的蚂蚁更脆更好吃。。。不要问我怎...

2017/03/12 16:30
115
米囧_人傻自有天来收

当智商不足以支撑一个人的生活的时候是什么样的场景

2017/03/12 09:11
28
最新的散装囧事

Today, our cat died. My husband and I had a touching bonding moment together. Our relationship has been strained for months, and I thought this could bring us closer. He decided...

2017/03/10 22:11
30
怼死人不偿命的囧事

Today, I was working at the pharmacy and had a older man come in. He was buying Viagra and, by law, we are required to ask if the patient had any questions. His lovely response ...

2017/03/09 22:03
29
那些手机和因为手机发生的倒霉事件

Today, after many weeks of talking to this guy over the phone for hours on end and establishing that we both had feelings for the other, we met in person. He saw me, got an "eme...

2017/03/08 20:42
54
美国人在日常的生活中关于恋爱和左爱的故事

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend and I lustfully requested we try doggy style this time. He responded, "No, Jesus wouldn't like that." FML 今天,在跟我的男朋友做爱的时候...

2017/03/07 22:25
312
关于燃烧脂肪的故事

Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shap...

2017/03/05 11:48
17

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